Listen up, Red States! Tired of being picked on by the liberal elite? Sick of being characterized as ignorant, redneck, bigoted hayseeds? Had enough with being ridiculed for your religion, conservatism, and politics?
Today is your lucky day. I’ve dismissed my usual pinko-commie audience so you and I can have a talk. (Hey, patchouli-breath! You with the dreadlocks and the Birkenstocks! Go listen to the Grateful Dead or something. The conservatives and I are talking.)
I know you quite well. We grew up together. We went to school together, got our first jobs together, and went to church together. It’s your friend Russ from Idaho, and states don’t get much redder than Idaho. I know you and you are good, upstanding, patriotic people.
I’d like to talk to you about this upcoming election. I know how much you love this country and believe that it has strayed from a decent and righteous path. That’s why I have to plead with you to not vote for president this year.
Yeah, that’s what I said, don’t vote. I know it’s too much to ask of you to vote for John Kerry. In my home state, 67% of you voted for Bush last election, which was more support than he got in Texas! It’s joked that the real election in Idaho is the Republican primary. I am realistic enough to realize that you cannot, in good conscience, vote for a Democrat.
However, that does not mean that you must vote for Bush. After all, you live in a Red State! Bush is going to win your state whether you vote or not. Your non-vote will not elect Kerry. So take this opportunity to send a message to the Republican Party that they can’t just take you for granted.
Many of you are my friends and I know you to be good compassionate Christian conservatives. So take a good look at the issues and events of the last four years. Does this feel like the Conservative Christian America in which you believe? Is it possible that rich people just may be using you to keep their power and make even more money?
The country has been run for the past four years by a Republican president, a Republican-controlled Congress, and a largely Republican judiciary. You’ve even managed to get a Republican news channel, and its ratings are trouncing the traditional liberal media! So, are you getting good Republicanism for all your votes?
I know you vote Republican because you believe in fiscal conservatism. How is it that with total control of the Congress that passes the spending bills and the president that can veto them, we have the largest deficits in our history? You worked hard to keep those free-spending liberals back in Taxachussetts and this is the thanks you get? By not voting, you can tell them they need to get back to their conservative values.
I know you’re champions of traditional family values. You were shocked by President Clinton’s behavior in the White House. It was very difficult to talk to our children when the news was filled with tales of oral sex and a stained blue dress. You voted for Republicans to restore some dignity and respect to the White House.
Therefore, I know how offended you felt when you saw the pictures from Abu Ghraib prison. How difficult it must have been to explain that to the children! By not voting, you can send a clear message that our leaders must be held accountable and that a good Christian president could never sanction nor allow our troops to commit torture.
I know you to be wary of big government. You vote for Republicans because you believe problems aren’t solved by creating more government programs. I know you want to keep the government out of your pocketbook and private affairs.
Therefore, I know how confused you must be about the extra layers of bureaucracy added to our government by this Republican administration. I know how strange you must feel about this Patriot Act that curtails the liberties of good, law-abiding folks like yourself. By not voting, you can tell the Republicans to do a better job of going after terrorists without sacrificing our way of life.
I know you strongly believe that we must win this war on terror – we all do! You’ll never forget that somber day in September when the terrorists brought their evil to our soil. We all rallied behind our leaders as they struck back against those who would harm us. We cheered when Bush vowed to get Osama bin Laden “dead or alive.”
Therefore, I know you are concerned about going into Iraq. A Republican would never get us bogged down in a quagmire like that Democrat President Johnson did in Vietnam, right? Surely, if a Republican told us that there was an imminent threat, there were tons of WMD’s, and we’d be greeted as liberators, then Iraq would be different than Vietnam. By not voting, you can tell the Republicans that our troops deserve better planning and intelligence gathering before rushing to war.
I know how deeply you support the troops. It has to be troubling to see our young people being killed and maimed in Iraq. They deserve every bit of support the citizens and the government can provide.
Therefore, I know how upset you are when our troops lack body armor. I know you’re mad at Kerry for voting against the $87 billion, but the bill passed and our troops still didn’t get body armor! Why didn’t the Republican-controlled government do more to help our troops? By not voting, you can tell them they are not supporting our military as they should.
You don’t have to vote for Bush. He’s going to win your state. If you feel that voting is a civic duty that you must perform, then write in John McCain. Nevertheless, send Bush a message: he needs to know that being a true Republican means more than just cutting taxes.
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_ | "RADICAL" RUSS BELVILLE | Read More at http://radicalruss.net/blog/
| Portland, Oregon U.S.A. | Permission is granted for reprint of this
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