“Radical” Russ’s mug shot from an arrest as a 17-year-old
I for the most part am a law-abiding citizen (well, except that law… I can’t see how a plant can be illegal). Mostly because I’m a big believer in doing unto others and maintaining a civil society, but also because I’m a chicken and I don’t want to go up against The Man.
I have had three run-ins with law enforcement where I have been arrested. Two stem from really loud parties that I threw and the subsequent disturbing the peace violations. At the time, “do unto others” didn’t take into account the idea that maybe others didn’t want Whitesnake blasting out of my home at jet-plane decibels at 2:30AM done unto them. (I wouldn’t have minded if others had done that unto me!)
The picture above, however, comes from the one time I have ever been in jail overnight. It was October 30, 1985. My friend Greg and I were on a double date with two girls at a movie at the Karcher Twin Cinemas, located in the Karcher Mall (now known as the mall the white people used to go to, as Chris Rock would put it). It was 11:00 at night, the mall was closed, the parking lot was empty, and the pavement was dry.
That’s when I had the bright idea to impress the girls by driving recklessly in my little Datsun B210 hatchback. I gunned the engine, sped across the parking lot, and at the corner I pulled the emergency brake and screeched around the corner…
…right into the direct line of sight of the Nampa police officer sitting in his cruiser around the corner not eight feet away from where my car skidded to a halt. Our cars face to face, he and I staring each other down throuh our windshields.
He motioned me to get out of the car. He put me in his cruiser and gave me a lecture and a ticket for reckless driving. Then he let me be on my way. I gave little thought to the ticket, figuring I’d pay my fine, my insurance would go up, and that would be that.
Well, needless to say, I did not realize at the time that reckless driving is an offense second only to DUI. I went to my court date along with Greg and my mom. Greg and I laughed at the defendants who came before me. One was arrested for indecent exposure, and we giggled audibly about that.
When my turn came I pleaded guilty and the judge pronounced sentence. “$250 fine, 5 days in jail, three days suspended, six months suspended license.” Gasp! Huh? “Bailiff, take the Mr. Belville into custody.” Oh my god, I’ve got to go to jail for two days!
Thankfully I was still a juvenile, so I was placed in the Canyon County jail in my own solitary cell. The most humiliating part was the next morning when I was forced to attend “jail school” with the other juveniles. I had already graduated high school and was a freshman at Boise State University. No matter, they told me, under the law all the juveniles had to go to their high school equivalency courses. I spent the two days tutoring semi-literate juveniles and telling myself to never, ever get arrested agin.
After I was released my insurance went up so high (rates for a single, 17-year-old male with a reckless driving ticket are about the highest bracket they have) that I could not afford insurance, and thus could not drive. Even after my license suspension was over I could not afford it. I went without driving for two years before I could afford the privilege.
So there’s your lesson for the day, kiddies. Don’t drive like a dick.
